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Grief

kalmpsychiatryllc

Grief, one of the most difficult emotions to define or describe. DSM-V says that if you are bereaved for more than one year after the loss in adults and more than six months in children, it is prolonged grief disorder if you additionally meet a spectrum of symptoms. However, it is so difficult to quantify or measure the intensity or duration of this unique human suffering. 


Grief is such a normal human reaction to losing someone or something, no matter how long it has been. I lost my mom in 2022 and still feel grief and sadness as well as a yearning to get her back. Some days are good, some days are okay, some days are bad but there is no day that I do not think of her as soon as I wake up. 


I have never understood why we pathologize grief. Who decides when it is enough grieving, when grieving crosses into the territory of a disorder, and when it should have gone away. 


In psychiatry, the more we pathologize and draw lines between normal and abnormal, the more we drift away from humanity and human suffering. There is no doubt that we have many serious psychiatric disorders that should be treated as such but not every sadness or every difficult emotion is a disorder. 


When we call something a disorder, we imply that there is something wrong with that individual that needs fixing or treating. This wall between them and the "normal world" can become a significant barrier to existing, living, and how they view themselves and the world. This goes for both grief and trauma as a lot of times, they co-exist. 


I don't really have any answers but I do feel that I am bereaved but not disordered. Sad at times but not depressed. Wistful, perhaps. I go on with my day but carry my mom with me. It does not feel like a disorder. In fact, it feels like strength, and comfort. 




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Kalm Psychiatry LLC

A Telepsychiatry Practice

Scottsdale, AZ 85259

Psychiatry, Psychiatrist, Psychology

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